The 124th Installment
My Choices
by Shuji Kinoshita,
Assistant Professor
My name is Shuji Kinoshita, and I was appointed as an assistant professor at AIIT in January of this year. My career is a little bit odd for a faculty member at an information-related graduate school. When I was an undergraduate, I majored in Indian philosophy and Buddhism at the University of Tokyo's Faculty of Letters. At that time, I was a literary or philosophical young man who worried about life in his own way. After seriously considering whether to enter the priesthood and choosing to live the Buddhist way as a layperson, I have reached the present through many twists and turns.
Speaking of choices, the Faculty of Letters at the University of Tokyo, where I was studying, has long had a series called “My Choices” in which faculty members write essays (mainly for first- and second-year undergraduates who are considering which laboratory to go to) just like the column at our school. While there was only a paper version when I was at Komaba, the series from 2006 onwards is also available on their website (http://www.l.u-tokyo.ac.jp/teacher/essay.html). As expected of teachers in the Faculty of Letters, all of their writing are works of art. I still recall them from time to time and go on the website to read them, but I will also think about my “choices" and write this column.
I imagine that some of you who are reading this may be considering admission to this school. What I want to tell you is that I want you to take a big step forward and make the “choice” to walk the path of learning again. Almost 10 years ago, I was working as a system engineer in the field, and when I faced various problems (a death march), I wanted to learn about computers and system development to solve the problems I was having in my work. That is when I quit my job and became a graduate student (At the time, AIIT was one of the schools I was thinking of applying to, but I vividly remember that I decided not to because I was living in the Kansai region...).
I think one of the biggest choices in my life was to quit working and go to a graduate school. This choice was not something I could do on your own, and I only have appreciation for my wife, parents, and others around me for supporting my choice.
Let's dive a little deeper into my choice at the time. I realized after writing this column that the word “choice” has a stronger connotation of choosing an option (or several options) from among multiple options, as opposed to just a simple “decision” or “determination.” Thinking back on what my options were at the time, they would look roughly like this:
1. Stay with the same company
2. Move to another company
3. Continue working and attend a graduate school for working adults
4. Quit working and go to a graduate school
I did not think too much about option 2 (because I liked my company). I thought about option 3 a lot, and I remember going to some graduate school information events. When it comes to option 4, it looks like I was really serious about what to do for money, and when I look at old files on my Google Drive, there are many monthly budgets and things like that. Ultimately, I chose option 4 because I thought I should give up trying to earn a daily income and take time off. This is what I think made it possible to spend the five years during my master’s and doctoral studies learning a new field, leading to my current career.
This is what I wanted to write, but when I think again about whether this choice was that self-directed, I cannot really say for sure. I have loved programming from a young age, and from there I turned to literature and philosophy. Then, I happened to only get offered a job for a system engineer position when searching for work. After that, I quit my job and entered a graduate school for information science. From there, I came to teach at AIIT. In a way, it feels as if I have been guided by a higher power. Are there any decisions that are autonomous in the first place? With this thought in mind, I suddenly looked at the bookshelf to my left. I saw the "Iwanami Dictionary of Buddhism 2nd Edition” that I had bought as an undergraduate student, and remembered that the Japanese word “choice” was a Buddhist term, and I felt that it was not me who had chosen this theme for the column. The summer equinox has passed and the red spider lilies are in full bloom.
Choice (“senchaku” or “senjaku”): It is pronounced “senchaku” in the Jodo sect of Buddhism, and “senjaku” in the Jodo-Shin sect. To choose the best from many. When Amida Buddha was the Bodhisattva Dharma Kara, Buddha Lokesvararaja showed him the many different worlds of the Buddhas. He chose from among them the good and discarded the bad. He then assimilated (and fully understood) the most excellent Jodo and the practice from it. He made the 48 Vows to establish the Jodo sect. These vows are called the Senchaku Hongan Nenbutsushu (“Collection of Selections on Nenbutsu and the Original Vows”). (Iwanami Dictionary of Buddhism 2nd Edition, Iwanami Shoten)